I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Randomize
