jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
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