You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
you had me at cake vodka
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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