i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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