for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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