Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
