She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
