What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
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