All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize