Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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