i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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