so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
My bed smells like the plague
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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