good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
