Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
We don't watch enough power rangers
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
So here I am, sexting at work.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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