What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
