I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
