Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
