Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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