the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
