P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
