Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
