happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
i out mim tonsoeep
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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