you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Randomize
