I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
