he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Randomize