I like to think it a success when the cops are called
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize
