She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
