It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize
