I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Watching her eat just hurts me
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
