the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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