After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
so much tequila, so little girl.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
