All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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