im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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