he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
