i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
