She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
