is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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