Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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