The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
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