these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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