I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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