I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
