i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Randomize