Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
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