The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
