Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
