so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
