oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
