Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
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