I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Randomize
