Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
